We finally sat down with the footage from April and cut it into something worth watching. Fifteen days, Málaga to Malta, aboard PONANT’s Le Bougainville — and a few minutes of it here.

The Andalusian horses at Cartagena are in there, and the dry Turia riverbed running through the middle of Valencia, and the coast dropping away below Deíà. So are the marble cartoon lobsters standing about in the medieval piazzas of Erice, which we are still not entirely sure we did not imagine. And Marsaxlokk, with the whole harbour of painted boats moving together.

What the film leaves out is the ticket that never worked, the walk to the winery through open country with no building in sight, and the twelve hours Chris spent being comprehensively unwell on the last night. All of that is in the written version, which is considerably longer and has the bits the camera missed.

Turn the sound up.